YEAR 2007 FOR PETS & PEOPLES
You know I am a sort of net-addict... so after wishing everyone just now " HAPPY NEW YEAR", ( yeah here is already new year...) I switched on PC.. and when I saw my mailbox, I thought...I am not the only one who use internet everytime... YES, the above picture is also a proof of it... !!! LOL but I never ordered anything ... OK...so I was reading about some new year's resolutions and suddenly thought that can pet have them too? And YES I came to know that, they too do have their own new years resolutions... SEE FEW OF THEM…LOL
PETS RESOLUTIONS
· I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
· My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
· I will no longer be beholden to the sound of the can opener.
· Cats: Circulate a petition that sleeping become a juried competition in major animal shows.
· Come to understand that cats are from Venus; dogs are from Mars.
· Take time from busy schedule to stop and smell the behinds.
· Hamster: Don't let them figure out I'm just a rat on steroids, or they'll flush me!
· Get a bite in on that freak who gives me that shot every year.
· Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is *too* much.
· Cats: Use new living room sofa as scratching post.
· January 1st: Kill the sock! Must kill the sock!
January 2nd - December 31: Re-live victory over the sock.
· The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.
· AND the Number 1 New Year's Resolutions Made by Pets...I will NOT chase the stick until I see it LEAVE THE IDIOT'S HAND ! 
So if pets can have such resolutions then what about peoples???? They also don’t want to stay behind… here are few ----
PEOPLES RESOLUTIONS
- Gain weight. At least 30 pounds…
- Stop exercising. Waste of time.
- Read less. Makes you think.
- Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.
- Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow.
- Spend more time at work, surfing with the T1.
- Take a vacation to someplace important: like, to see the largest ball of twine.
- Not jump off a cliff just because everyone else did.
- Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.
- Not have eight children at once.
- Get in a whole NEW rut!
- Start being superstitious.
- Personal goal: bring back disco.
- Not bet against the Minnesota Vikings.
- Buy an '83 Eldorado and invest in a really loud stereo system.
- Get the windows tinted. Buy some fur for the dash.
- Speak in a monotone voice and only use monosyllabic words.
- Only wear jeans that are 2 sizes too small and use a chain or rope for a belt.
- Spend my summer vacation in Cyberspace.
- Not eat cloned meat.
- Create loose ends.
- Get more toys.
- Get further in debt.
- Not believe politicians.
- Not drive a motorized vehicle across thin ice.
- Avoid transmission of inter-species diseases.
- Avoid airplanes that spontaneously drop 1000 feet.
- Stay off the International Space Station.
- Not swim with piranhas or sharks.
- Associate with even worse business clients.
- Spread out priorities beyond my ability to keep track of them.
- Wait around for opportunity.
- Focus on the faults of others.
- Mope about my faults.
- Never make New Year's resolutions again.
As many of you know already that I love LEWIS BLACK COMEDY.... So though I don't have broadband connection yet, ( I may get after 2nd Jan 2007) and I can't even hear OR see both the videos... still I am posting THESE TWO VIDEOS to make you laugh and make your entry as cheerful & happy in year 2007!!!! I hope both videos must be DECENT enough to suit my page..!!! 
