A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well, how was the honeymoon?" asked the mother.
"Oh mamma!" she exclaimed. "Tthe honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic!" No sooner had she spoken the words than she burst out crying. "But mamma . . . as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language. He's been saying things I've never heard before! All these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home... please mamma!"
"Now Sarah . . ." her mother answered. "Calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words has he been using?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mamma." wept the daughter. "I'm so embarrassed! They're just too awful! You've got to come get me and take me home... please mamma!"
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset . . . Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride replied, "Oh, mamma . . . words like dust, wash, iron, and cook!"
A man and woman were recently celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. While cutting the cake, the wife was moved after seeing her husband's eyes fill with tears.
The wife took his arm, and looked at him affectionately. "I never knew you were so sentimental." she whispered.
"No . . . No . . ." he said, choking back his tears, "That's not it at all. Remember when your father found us in the barn and told me to either marry you or spend the next 50 years in jail?"
"Yes," the wife replied. "I remember it like yesterday."
"Well," said the husband, "Today I would have be a free man."
Another Late Night . . .
The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his cheek. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in at six o'clock in the morning?"
"There is." he replied, "Breakfast."
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My Dad loves jokes...and he has a great sense of humour so I told him these jokes...and he enjoyed a lot..!
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